i just hope...

God knows what i'm going through right now, iknow he gave me strength to face this, i know thathe won't let me feel this way if he knew i can'tsurvive this problem of mine, but, i just hope... icould talk to someone i can, i mean... the people iused to confide my problems are too busy..., i'venothing against that... i understand that they havelife, i also know that if i would just drop a call or txtthem, not less than a minute, they will respondbut... i know that they have lots of problemalready. people around me now... sigh... people itrust... i feel comfortable talking with... damn... i'mso dissapointed to know that... they're just one ofthose people who says they understand me... welli guess they do, but behind my back, they uses itto find loop holes to my actions, every flaws, dirtand mistakes i have done... they're using it againtsme... simply because... they don't know me thatmuch... i know i' m not an Angel... but God knowswhat i'm doing purposely and not, i know i'm not amonster as well... i maybe mean, talkless andharsh but i'm no EVIL! i'm so dissapointed to knowthat the people left which i thought whounderstands and knows me... are just one of mydetractors and critics, sigh... if only... i just.... it'sall i can say, wala na akong malabasan ngproblema..., people i trust... ayoko ng dsumag dagsa problem nyo, sa mga nasa paligid ko, how can itell you my problem if you don't know me... howcan you understand? i just hope... i could talk tosomeone, i'm such a tear jerker, but now... i feelthat my eyes are to tired of crying... ALONE, i'mnot trying to get sympathy here, i just don't knowwhere to release my problem... i can't talk to myfamily, i have to be strong for them, they're gettingtheir strength from me as well... but i'm just ahuman, i'm not God nor a Superhero that can do amiracle, please if you are reading this right now, ifyoure just gonna reply something nonsense, makefun out of this or just simply can't say anythinggood, please, don't even bother say/ type a singleword! or i'm gonna jab the hell out of your ass, i'mnot joking this time... please